Times have been hard, and days have been long, but there has between plenty good and great moments in between. I thought we (the mister and I) were outnumbered with three children, but then adding a pandemic and having our children with us 24/7, raised the bar on what we felt really overwhelmed us.
I have had to up being more patient, mild and mindful (easier said than done) these last few months and work on healing my inner child (triggers) so I can help my children thrive in the present.
So what have I done to help get on by:
Continue to inculcate a spiritual foundation in them.
I have prayed for and with my children. I want them to remember where their true source of strength comes from (Isaiah 12:2) and who they can always rely and vent to (Psalms 28:7).
It’s my parental duty to help train them up (Proverbs 22:6) and my strong hope is that in doing so, they can resort to true wisdom no matter what tribulations they face.
We have all got on each other’s nerves at some point, but Norvaris and I have made it a point to practice forgiveness in front of the kids and with them as well. We may have to step away and gather ourselves or separate the kids, but we want to fortify
Explain, Show, and Listen.
Children will follow what you do before they do as you say. I’ve done it, I have seen it happen, and have experienced it as a mother myself.
EXPLAIN
With more tension added to put plates, I have given into explaining things more for the kids. We all fall short and need a reminder or two (or three), so I’ve been extending mercy in that way toward the kids. I have also made them get in a good habit of explaining how they feel and what they need in the moment. Allowing them to do so freely, gives them the comfort to freely express themselves and know they can talk to us when needed.
SHOW
From experience, both sides are understanding of what to expect, and when we both feel heard, we are able to work better as a unit, and enjoy each other’s company.
All the characteristics and fruitages of the spirit I want them to portray, I have to complete in action myself, so daily I strive to be loving, peace-making, honorable etc. They also see when mommy messes up and then get to see me accept my faults and apologize and know I am a human who makes mistakes and has to try hard to do right, just like them.
LISTEN
Besides the scheduled Zoom play dates and FaceTime, I have simply listened to them more. There’s no school to run off to or any appointments to catch. There is more one-on-opportunities, so what a perfect opportunity and blessing to have them speak their mind, clear their heads and communicate to me. I can see it in their face and demeanor the difference it makes to stop for a second and show you see them and want to give them the attention they deserve, to hear them.
Help them find healthy ways to cope and be aware of their mental health.
•Help them find a new hobby to get into.
•Start journaling to write out feelings and thoughts.
•Coping mechanisms like: Painting, play doh activities, reading, a quick walk outside, water/sensory play etc.
•Practice breathing techniques to help them manage sudden moments of frustration.
•Print out and recite positive affirmations to help with sadness or too boost motivation and mindset.
•Give them moments to play together, but also alone. Everyone deserves a moment to themselves.
•More hugs, one-on-ones, and bonding.
•Celebrate the small wins (read a whole book, character improvement, sharing etc).
Here are some of the Instagram accounts that have been very helpful for me to parent consciously:
@mymotherhoodmagic
@raisegoodkids
@theconsciouskid
@biglittlefeelings
@monicajsutton
Pinterest:
My “Raise Them Up” folder I have saved many positive parenting tips and tricks.
Website:
For bible lessons and kid-friendly study activities for spiritual encouragement at
How have you and your family gotten through so far? I’d love to hear your experience and what are some of your favorite tips?
-xo Natasha